INTERVIEW II, Random Child, 1/16/09
In an ongoing effort to provide you, the reader, with valuable content, Richardgin.org and I Fall To Pieces are pleased to present this extensive interview with members of the band, Random Child, conducted on January 16th, 2009.

Jack Greenleaf: Wait, do you have questions and everything?

Rich Gin: Eh, I sort of wing it. So we're here with Random Child; If you could introduce yourselves.

JG: My name is Jack Greenleaf and I play guitar and keyboards...

Ian Cory: ...and bass...

JG: ...and bass.

IC: I'm Ian Cory, I play drums, keyboards and sing on the record, I mostly sing live.

Eli Sidman: I'm Eli Sidman and I play bass primarily but on the songs I've written on guitar I [also] play guitar.

RG: And you all know each other from previous bands?

JG: Well! There was this very serious band called Cool & Unusual Punishment. It consisted of me, Henry Crawford from The Mighty Handful and Ian Cory.

IC: And for a while, Scout [Pare-Phillips from Radiates].

JG: For a while we had Scout at the end. And [Cool & Unusual] was, like, pop music but Ian always had metal drums in the background. So I thought there was definitely some originality to it but also it just wasn't very good.

ES: I really liked it.

JG: Banzai loved it; Jonathan Edelstien thought we were the shit and, like, Max Coburn thought we were the shit.

Tola Brennan: That last show WAS the shit.

JG: That's Tola Brennan, by the way.

RG: Tola Brennan is listening, by the way, and kicking in his two cents. He is welcome to do so.

ES: I was in The Floor Is Lava for a long time as guitar player and then I was the bass player for Zinko Propolus, which was Tola's old band.

JG: I also...

ES: You played bass for Zinko Propolus for a show.

JG: I also played bass for The Floor Is Lava for one show...

ES: Two shows. At the very end. And then the last song of our last show.

JG: The last show [Calamity] Sam, like, dropped the bass and ran away. So I jumped on stage and played and it was like old times.

IC: Jack and I were in Tetsuwan Fireball for one show.

JG: With Henry [Crawford]. It was weird.

IC: And I was also - and still am - in Earth Defense Force, in the sense that Earth Defense Force still exists.

ES: You're on hiatus.

JG: The world doesn't need any saving right now.

IC: Yeah, it's OK; Obama's in office.

ES: In four to eight years you guys will come back out with another two songs.

IC: I was also in Somewhere There's A Fix and we were terrible.

ES: I liked it too! I've got those recordings I think they're good!

JG: They were a metal-core band. It's just the most upstate thing you'll ever hear.

RG: Taking it back to Eli saying he liked all these bands - who is your audience?

ES: For The Floor Is Lava - I feel like this whole scene started around the time when The Floor Is Lava and Cool & Unusual and Tetsuwan started. Before then there was The Hysterics, who I don't think exist anymore...

IC: And Fiasco was around as Stun Gun.

ES: They were pretty much just a punk band at that point.

JG: The scene at that time just wasn't as strong. I think Fiasco were making a lot of connections at that time. They were meeting Starscream; meeting people like Gavin from Consumer Feedback who's a really, really talented promoter.

ES: Yeah. I think the first show we ever had was in Staten Island and I think we got it from Consumer Feedback and that was with you guys and Tetsuwan...

JG: No that wasn't Consumer Feedback, that was Demand For Cheaper Money.

ES: Demand For Cheaper Money, yeah. Back then our audience was just our friends. I remember before every show the band would get together and go through our phonebooks on our cell phones and just call everyone we knew regardless of whether we'd spoken to them in two years and say, "Hey our band is playing a show! You should come." And then [if anyone] showed up [it] was great. Parents came.

JG: Parents are a great audience.

ES: The Floor Is Lava, had one 21+ show where a bunch of our teachers came which was cool.

RG: How did that go over?

ES: It was good. The venue was pretty shitty. We didn't sound great. But there were ten of our teachers and parents there, which was kind of nice. And then other than that it was just other bands. I mean, that was always the audience I always enjoyed playing to the most - my friends who were in bands. Because, you'd talk about what stuff you were writing over the course of the [previous] week or two and then you'd come get together for a show again and you'd say, "Check out this new song I wrote," and everyone would play their new stuff.

JG: Actually, I think the biggest audience was other bands. And I think that's still true. And I think that now that the scene is meshing with the Todd P scene in a way with Gabe Weinstock I feel like Fiasco is kind of taking the next step and not necessarily [leaving] this scene but also, like...

IC: Expanding...

JG: ...bringing them together a bit more. I think that's really nice. I think it's become much more like - you see the exact same people every time which I think is good and bad because there's always a lot of people, but it's also... y'know.

ES: At the shows I've been to since I haven't been performing, like, the audience is made up of the same people every time which is kind of cool because you go to a show and you know you'll see those twelve kids.

JG: You make friends and stuff.

IC: In terms of Random Child's audience in this scene I don't really know if we have one.

JG: I think with Random Child we have the same attitude we had in Cool & Unusual, which was, "Whoever likes us, likes us," and we don't really care. But right now we're in the process of trying to see what kind of people would enjoy it and we're just shopping around to everyone.

IC: From what I can tell everyone enjoys one part on the record.

JG: Everyone likes one thing.

ES: If not a song, then a part of a song.

IC: I was joking around saying, "Oh there's something for everyone," but there's also something for everyone to hate.

ES: Again, from what I've seen, the primary audience is other bands. I've played some stuff for Jonathan Edelstein and his friends, I mean [Jonathan] is in the band, but other members of Banzai and they all think it's really cool. And I played some stuff for [Calamity] Sam and he thought it was awesome. We tried to do something that no one we know who plays music has done before - at least that was an effort for me; do something that I haven't heard anyone our age do. So when I play those parts for people they say, "Cool! I never would have done that or thought about doing that."

IC: For me it wasn't a conscious attempt to write things differently, It's just that it's always what I wanted to do - the more metal sounding stuff - that I just never had a chance to do before. For me it's about finally being able to write whatever the hell I want.

RG: The only track I've heard is the one online - Angel of Dead New York - and it seems like it's either the opening for Side A or the opener of Side B. It's as if the song is setting up to lead into something else. So - ugly question - is this a song cycle or a concept album?

ES: The concept is chaos and, quite literally, random-ness.

IC: There are some lyrical themes throughout the record. It wasn't like I set out saying, "OK here's the next song in the storyline and there are this many characters and we're going to have a string orchestra..."

ES: And a boy who is deaf, dumb and blind.

IC: Exactly. And in the end we tear down the wall. It wasn't like that. The lyrics all kind of relate to similar things, except for maybe Illusions, which is our hardcore punk song.

ES: Which is the one that's probably the most tongue-in-cheek.

IC: The main song on the record in my opinion is the closing track, Plague, which is nine minutes long and has three separate parts.

JG: It is definitely embracing its ridiculousness. There's a part where Ian is just saying, "Mountains will crumble," - talking - over the heaviest riff you can imagine - just chugging. It's just Ian talking. He would say a line and [have to] back away from the microphone [because he'd be] laughing and we'd giggle for a while and then he'd go back. But you listen to it and it works.

IC: The idea running through the song is that everyone to some degree is fucked up. And not in the sense that I hate everyone, because that's not true at all, but more like everyone, even amazing people, wonderful, inspiring people have some side to them that's really ugly and really hideous and no matter what you do to hide it the really disgusting parts of your personality are still there.

ES: It's funny because I wrote all of Plague except for one part.

IC: Yeah, the Dream Theater bit.

ES: And for me the song has a totally different feeling. Writing it on guitar and listening to it in its entirety, to me it seems like the rise and fall of a band in nine minutes. It's got all these different parts and the sound changes constantly but it's all linked together. It gets exciting and happy and exotic and pretty and then it gets all heavy and chuggy and in the end it burns out like a really bright flash of light and then there's a little acoustic outro like, 'there's still hope.' The first time I heard it I thought, "This makes me feel like I'm in a band and having it form and then fight and then crumble."

JG: The main thing about this album - this band has been a lot of not really doing anything, not getting off [our] ass. We had songs [on the shelf] for years, where we would finish one part of it and be really proud of ourselves and never finish it.

ES: How long were we around?

JG: I don't think it really counts...

ES: ...Random Baby.

IC: There are two stages of Random Child - there's Random Baby and that was when we first started off with me and friends of mine who weren't really musicians; I was just really close with [them].

ES: And you weren't even really a musician at that point.

IC: I was more of a musician than anyone else. And the only remaining members from that time are Joey [Hurtado] and me. Joey is our other guitarist and he isn't here because he lives in Staten Island. Distance was a problem and scheduling because everyone just started getting really busy but we had a few riffs. What we used to do is take a riff and we'd jam on it for ten minutes and the other guys didn't know how to change melodically - they'd just be playing the riff and I'd just be drum soloing.

ES: I joined the band after this phase.

IC: Jonathan [Edelstein] joined then because I wanted to have another drummer and at that point it was like, "OK, if we're going to have Jonathan Edelstien from fucking Fiasco in the band, we're going to have to get our shit together." And we started writing the songs and it became quickly apparent to the people in the band who weren't musicians that they would have to leave. And so Jack joined and shortly thereafter Eli joined.

JG: The album is more of us trying to finish something and just the fact that we finished something is really encouraging. So [the album] is much more for ourselves than anyone else.

IC: I don't think people will like this in the, "Oh I love this album it's my new favorite band!" sense, although I think there will be one person in the world who would think that...

RG: ...possibly in Norway.

ES: Someone out there other than us will love every part of this album.

IC: I think most people will be like, "Oh wow!"

JG: "Oh wow, that's Ian!"

IC: "Oh wow, Random Child; this is really happening..."

JG: "Ian is that you? Oh my God!" It's like, "Yeah, mom!"

IC: Although [my parents] did sit through Somewhere There's A Fix...

JG: I liked Somewhere There's A Fix, but if I was a parent and heard that I'd be like, "Y'know you're not singing on key."

ES: "Put your shirt back on."

JG: Again, the songs are concepts, not really the album.

IC: I've already worked on a lot of material for the next record.

JG: I feel like this band has gotten its shit together so quickly and with all my other bands it's like, "Oh we'll record when we have money..."

ES: Wasn't your only practice space [in the early days] in the basement of Ian's house? Which you could only use one day a week?

JG: Yeah, Cool & Unusual could only practice at Ian's house once a week.

ES: And I think at my house you practiced twice. I think the fact that [we] have a place where [we] can go and rehearse is nice.

IC: I also always thought that the place where a band practices has a huge impact on how they sound. Cool & Unusual, we practiced in my well-lit, comfortable living room and we had this...

JG: ...well-lit, comfortable sound.

IC: And then The Floor Is Lava, they practiced in Eli's basement, which is a bunker - the most disgusting, war-zone kind of place and they came out and they sounded like a fucking G.I. unit. Just deadly.

ES: It's funny because we sounded awful in my basement but Random Child sounds pretty good in my basement.

IC: This is where we're supposed to be; it's just loud and angry...

JG: ...and gross and sometimes one of us isn't wearing deodorant because it's a Sunday.

IC: But for a week in the summer right before we went in to the studio we practiced every day and we got so good.

JG: And we never got angry at each other.

IC: It was amazing.

JG: This seems like instant band.

IC: Just add basement.

RG: Over the last six months or so a lot of the bands in the scene have been "muscling up" their sound live and in the studio. Talk about the sound in terms of album production because what I've heard has a high level of execution.

JG: Well, we recorded at GaluminumFoil, which is a studio in Williamsburg.

IC: So much fun. It was probably the best part of my summer - just going into the studio and it was just a blast - one, just playing the tunes and then having them played back.

JG: At first, I'll be honest, we were playing in Eli's basement and I was like, "This will be OK. I don't know if we're tight enough to do this... I don't know." And we went in and I thought it was really interesting to see the environment the audio engineer creates to make you feel comfortable and make you do your best.

ES: Yeah I've recorded at GaluminumFoil three times now: Twice with The Floor Is Lava and once with Random Child and I worked there for a month for an internship. The guy who works there is this guy Jeff [Berner] - plug to Jeff - he's just an incredibly...

IC: ...tall...

ES: ...skilled, very tall. I sort of jokingly challenged Jack to give [Jeff] the most ridiculous description of the sound he wanted on his guitar that he could think of - it was the keyboard! [Jack] told him you wanted the keyboard to sound like is was on a boat, alone, in the middle of a lake on a foggy night.

JG: And he did it.

ES: He was, like, "Oh, that's easy." And it took three seconds; he twisted some knobs and was like, "Try it now!" And Jack plays a big chord and says, "That's perfect!"

IC: We did that with the guitar too, we wanted it to sound like we're under water in a submarine. And he said, "Let me get my Fucked Up Pedal."

JG: It was really fucked up. I don't know what that pedal does - It just makes you sound like you're on a submarine radar.

ES: I give him so much credit though. He's good at what he does and he's nice and he knows how to give the band as much help as they want, he knows the things you want done without having to be asked.

IC: I was surprised. I came in and said OK, I want the guitar sound to be really heavy and sound like this record and I gave him Catch 33 by Meshuggah...

JG: And he listened to, like, 3 seconds of it and said, "OK, we can do that."

IC: We started playing Subjects, the first track, and I thought to myself, "This is the heaviest thing I've ever heard." It's ridiculous how quickly the most amazing parts happened. I felt good going in and when we finished the drums sounded awesome Jonathan's drumming sounded great my drumming - of course my drumming sounded wonderful.

JG: I think Jonathan drummed on the exact right track.

ES: Unfortunately Jonathan played on only one song because he had a dentist appointment. He said, "I'll come back," and by the time he came back we had finished.

JG: But he came back, which is really nice.

ES: We took a cab back to Ian's place and Jonathan rode his bike behind us...

JG: ...And I kept looking out the back window saying, "I don't think he's going to make it!"

ES: ...And he followed us for, like, twenty blocks and then he got lost. We turned a corner and he was gone and he was replaced by a huge black dude on a bike.

IC: Which just plays into the theory that Jonathan is a shape-shifter.

ES: I think the hardest part about this band is getting Jonathan to come out and practice. He's in Fiasco and Banzai and everything extracurricular at school and he's definitely feeding starving children in other countries every other weekend. It's just really hard to nail him down and his phone never works or he loses it.

JG: But he's always very, very supportive and very, very professional.

IC: I think he really digs the music. When he plays - there are definitely songs on the record that I wish he'd played on. I wish he'd played on Stasis. There were songs that I definitely should have played on, like Angel of Dead New York, I think I played that better than him.

JG: The thing is, since Ian's the main writer in this band, it's mainly Ian and us around him.

ES: Either doing things he says, or presenting things to him that he would appreciate.

JG: He's like a king.

ES: It's [his] baby. That's how I saw it when I joined the band. This isn't music I really listened to before, in fact most of the stuff that influenced Random Child I listened to after I joined the band because [Ian] gave me 5 CD's of homework to listen to. For The Floor Is Lava I just wrote whatever [I wanted] and because there were five people in the band we all got to say, "This sucks or that sucks," or ,"We'll use this but change this." Now, with Random Child, I basically do the same thing; I'll write something that I think is cool and show it to Ian and he'll say, "That's too light," or, "That's perfect; can you bring it down a half step."

JG: I think that's the reason we all get along so well; we're all on the same page and it's not democratic. It's totalitarian and it's great. And there are no arguments, really, because we all know what we're trying to achieve.

ES: And because I have no foundation writing music like this if Ian says, "That's terrible," I'm like, "OK! I'll write something new!"

JG: There are some riffs I wrote and I'd say to myself, "This is terrible. It's just me playing five notes fast and no scale," and Ian would say, "No! That's it!" and I have to just trust him. But it sounds good on the record, it sounds like it belongs there.

IC: I think going back to when we were recording Pilgrimage, Joey [Hurtado] - both Jack and Joey have very interesting limitations on guitar. Joey's not very good at playing chord-based music...

ES: ...He doesn't have a lot of rhythm with his right hand. He can do some really impressive stuff speed-wise and riff wise if he practices a lot and he actually does practice, which is amazing to me.

JG: Joey is someone who listens to metal. I listen to, like, Explosions in the Sky, which is heavy but... sensitive...

IC: That is a part of our sound though, more Mono than Explosions in the Sky.

ES: I totally appreciate Joey though, because Joey will come to a practice and I'll try and teach him a riff and I won't even know the names of the notes I'll [count off], "3rd fret, 4th fret, 5th fret," and he'll sit there with his Sidekick writing God-knows what and he'll be barely able to play [the riff]. I'll say, "How can we play this song he can't play this riff?" and then he'll come back two weeks later and be able to play it perfectly.

JG: Or he'll play it different and better.

IC: But there was a point where we were recording Pilgrimage where [Joey] couldn't do the folky, rhythm parts and Jack said, "I'll just do it," and then there's the part in Angel of Dead New York where Jack said, "I can't do this part with the fast picking," and Joey said, "I'll just do it."

ES: That was the fun part about recording. There was so little ego in the studio. We went in and there are some songs that Ian and I wrote and then every other practice Jack and Joey would learn a part of a part of a song, like, on bass or something. But once we got into the studio if one of us said, "I can't play this," we'd just pass the instrument off on to someone else. On Illusions, Joey said, "There should be a solo here." I had already done my solo on Stasis and I didn't want to solo again because I'm not that versatile; it was going to sound the same so I said, "Jack, you do it." And he was like, "Whhhhaaaaaaat?" and [he] took it and it sounds awesome.

JG: I still don't remember ever playing that. They keep telling my I played a solo on that song and I'm pretty sure I didn't.

ES: It's great because you basically took as many strings as you could grab as high up on the neck as you could go and bent them as much as possible and picked as fast as you could and it sounds brilliant. It sounds perfect for what the song is and you did it in one take and said, "Is that ok?"

IC: And it's over this riff in 5/4 where I'm singing this... metal-scat thing it's completely ridiculous but it works.

ES: And I told you whenever I play that song for someone and it gets to that part with the harmonics everyone's always, "That's so cool! Who did that?" and I say, "Jack Greenleaf," and they say, "Whatta G."

RG: This question might be ahead of its time, but is the goal for Random Child to become a live band? I know [Ian] and I were talking about this last night; about picking your spots, playing shows where you might get a different audience or people who would definitely appreciate it.

IC: Well I do want to play a few shows with the local bands. I'd love to play a show with Fiasco or Banzai.

JG: So basically you want to make Jonathan's life a living hell?

ES: If we could get a show with Banzai, Random Child and Fiasco it would kick so much ass and I think the people they bring would really appreciate it.

JG: I can't imagine The Mighty Handful and Random Child playing a show on the same [bill] because the energy is different and the ideas are different.

IC: I think if Random Child starts playing live then it will have that theatricality to it. I don't want to just play shows.

JG: There's so much theatricality to the music...

IC: The thing is, we kind of embrace the ridiculousness of it all...

JG: ...Embrace the melodrama.

IC: ...Because there’s nothing wrong with it.

RG: Well that's what metal is at it's best - with a heavy dose of absurdity.

ES: Yeah that's why Dragon Force sucks; because they think they're the best band ever and what they're doing is the coolest thing.

JG: I think in general when people take things seriously it becomes more fun but we're embracing the...

IC: ...Like, there’s a part where I'm just doing spoken word in a Norwegian accent and I'm speaking from the perspective of the black plague - it's kind of insane. But there's nothing wrong with being absurd.

ES: On the other hand, bands that don't take themselves seriously enough won't sound as good because they're obviously not into it as much. But bands who play that up too much like Dragon Slayer, remember them? From Staten Island? With the rainbow glasses...

IC: I left before they played because I was so pissed off at that show.

ES: This guy had an axe that his microphone was on and he - this big fat guy - wore a tunic and he wore this pink heart-shaped glasses and he walked around talking in this crazy accent like, "Zees glahsses ah made of drahgon glahs!" and he said something about unicorns like, "Unicorns ah mean zhey steal ahnd zhey rape." And there were three people there to see them and they were all wearing costumes. And then they were just bad. It was like Tenacious D to the negative tenth power.

JG: I actually think our seriousness is along the lines of They Might Be Giants because they take themselves very, very seriously and they're very professional and they write some genuinely heartbreaking songs. At the same time they wrote Istanbul.

IC: That was a cover; they wrote I Hope That I Get Old Before I Die.

ES: We were talking about movies earlier today and we decided that no matter how ridiculous the premise, so long as the movie takes itself seriously then it's going to be good and I think it's the same thing with being in a band.

IC: I think we're like the movie Battle Royal. In the sense that you're thinking, "Holy shit! What the hell just happened!?" When Jack and I first watched it I was so depressed [after] and when Joey came over and watched it he just laughed and we ended up having the best time because it was just a bunch of Japanese kids killing each other. And with Random Child you can be like, "That's really interesting and thought provoking," or you can be like, "This is the most absurd thing on the planet! They're playing in 19/16? Why are they doing that?"

ES: If the audience gets it and views it from one of those two perspectives it will be good. But playing shows is hard because it's hard to get everyone together.

JG: I don't see us being a live band for a while. I think maybe this coming summer, honestly. We tried to do it this winter break and we got together and practiced and we wrote new stuff and a lot of it sounded awesome.

ES: But then everyone went away.

JG: It's just distance.

IC: But once we get everyone together I want to play a few shows with local metal bands like Inswarm or Hull.

JG: Or more people I don't know.

IC: I just found this band Consider The Source; have you heard of them?

JG: I want to play with Krallice. Krallice are intense.

IC: I also have friends in other bands upstate from being in Somewhere There's A Fix. I wouldn't mind playing shows with Matt [Weinberg] - it would be a bit strange but I do want to branch out and see what the response would be from a scene that would be in to heavier music. It's kind of funny because here in the Brooklyn, Park Slope Indie scene we have parts where I'm screaming and we tune to drop-D to play doom metal riffs but then if we play with other metal bands we have arts where I sing cleanly over acoustic guitar parts. We're too heavy for the indie kids and too light for the metal heads.

ES: Like Metallica: Too heavy for the punk clubs, too light for the metal clubs.

[At this point, Ian is compared to Lars Ulrich and swearing happens. Tola plays music in the background to get attention.]

RG: I noticed at the last Vanishing Point show there were about 125 people and I didn't know 100 of them. Do you - and this is an question independent of Random Child - but do you notice that the crowds are composed of more people than there used to be?

JG: Yes. And the worst part of it is that I look at them and say, "What are the eight graders doing here?" I feel like, especially at the Old Stone House show; I mean I thought it was successful and we [play that venue for charity] every year - Henry [Crawford], Ian and I - Ian less so this year.

IC: My mom basically organized the last two...

JG: Your mom is the shit.

RG: That's going in the interview.

JG: Your mom is the shit. She's the one who made us dinner at every practice.

IC: Sometimes my dad would do it too.

JG: And your dad is really cool; He has some really cool stories that we can't tell here. But it's kind of like in with the new and out with the old. I'm interested in seeing what the younger bands are going to do and what the younger bands are going to be because I feel like there aren't any [younger bands] yet.

ES: I'm so afraid because those are kids who are inspired by us. That can't possibly be good. We're so half-assed to begin with. That's why Fabian [Kaupert] scares me so much. Because he's so into the music - I mean Fabian's bag still has a The Floor Is Lava flyer on it - his bag for school. And I love that he came to all out shows and was really into it, but I can't imagine someone seeing me play music thinking, "That's cool! I want to do that!" and then starting a band. It's like, "What awful spawn did I create?"

IC: I think Jetlag was like that. I thought, "Wow this is the band that Fiasco would inspire."

ES: I mean I'm inspired by Fiasco; I have such a low opinion of my own music.

JG: With bands like The Crayons and Runtime Error - I mean Runtime Error has members of Fiasco in it - but I mean, Jack Wolf and Lucio Westmorland [Ex-Care Bears on Fire] who are probably now going to inherit; we're probably going to leave and they're going to make [the scene] a big deal.

ES: It's actually really creepy too, because I used go to a Fiasco show and there would be all these freshman kids from my high school who I'd despise and I'd be like, "Why are you here?" and they'd say, "Well, we're groupies with Lucio. And Lucio was like, 'I'm going to a Fiasco show!" And so we did too."

JG: Lucio is the nicest guy on the planet. He has a whole studio in his basement now. That's where Women. are recording, The Mighty Handful started recording there and that's when I said, "[The Mighty Handful] have to get tighter." I'm such a band bitch.

ES: When they were younger - like, Care Bears on Fire; I don't want to talk shit about anybody - when those kids were younger they were bad musicians and they sounded like they were nine and ten year olds playing music.

JG: It was more like they were just doing it and not thinking about it.

ES: It's kind of weird because Fiasco was kind of like their den mother; taught them all how to dress and it pissed me off for a while because they weren't very good and they were kind of imitating these kids who were a couple of years older than them but now it's gotten to the point where Lucio’s drumming just blows me away; they actually have their own set of skills which is cool.

JG: And Jack Wolf has the best guitar tones.

ES: They've both learned to really appreciate what they're doing.

IC: We'd love to play a show with The Crayons.

RG: They were supposed to play last night. Wha' happan'?

JG: Knowing them, they're just really shy and really - "I don't think this is going to go well..."

ES: I was Jack Wolf's CIT for songwriting at Berkeley Carroll a long time ago.

RG: They need to work on the shyness thing because watching peoples' backs is really a bummer.

ES: Someone, probably Jack Wolf, decided it was too cold to leave his house yesterday.

RG: I will accept that explanation.

IC: I think Dexter Loos said that. I think Dexter would like Random Child.

JG: I love Dexter. His enthusiasm at first is shocking and you think he might be kidding. I love all those people who I rarely talk to but keep showing up - to any of the shows. I remember when I first went to Stun Gun, which was Fiasco in 6th grade...

IC: First band I ever saw live.

JG: I went to their show and I remember thinking, "I can't hear the vocals at all," because Jonathan [Edelstein] would just be, "[mumbles lyrics]."

IC: And then Lucian would sing and they would do Puddle of Mudd covers.

JG: They did She-fucking-Hates Me with Lucian screaming.

IC: Every time I think I'm doing something wrong with my life I remember hearing that and say, "It's ok!"

JG: You look at Fiasco and I'm just amazed at how good they are now and how hilarious they were before. Even early Fiasco every other song was incredible and then there was some stuff where you just [shrugs].

ES: All the really fast punk stuff that's two minutes long that they don't do anymore - they still have that attitude but they're never going to play those songs again.

IC: They're not going to play TK421...

ES: They'd play CBGB's and they'd do 20 songs in 10 minutes.

JG: With Modrocket - they’d always be with Modrocket and the Bones Royal. And then Mod Rocket went to California.

IC: And then Modrocket broke up.

ES: The old bass player of Modrocket goes to my school; I discovered her really weirdly. I was advertising Brooklyn music and Brooklyn bands, and of course on the internet you can ask people and see if they have certain things. I was advertising The Floor Is Lava and Tetsuwan and Fiasco and this random person was like, "Fiasco's really pretentious," and I said, "I guess... They're nice guys. Do you know them?" and she said, "Yeah I used to play shows with them all the time." Finally, I said, "Who are you?" She said, "I was in a band called Modrocket," and I said, "Oh! I was in The Floor Is Lava," and she was like, "OH SHIT! LAVA!" so we connected really randomly.

JG: I think the most inspiring thing is that Fiasco did what they wanted to do as hard as they could even when it was kind of shitty and now you read magazines with High Places and No Age - [Fiasco] loves No Age; they're one of [Fiasco's] favorite bands - and then they open for No Age and No Age love them [back]. I can't even imagine that feeling of one of your favorite bands really liking you.

IC: Like, if we opened for Isis or Opeth. My head would explode.

RG: You guys touched on this before how you regret the younger bands looking up to you - who were the standard bearers for you? Were there any?

ES: Tetsuwan. I mean, Tetsuwan started before The Floor Is Lava and eventually [Calamity] Sam became our bass player. I just remember Sam saying, "I'm in a band now." Back then Tetsuwan Fireball was fueled by Sam's irrational hatred of The Hysterics. I remember after each song during their first three shows Sam saying, "FUCK THE HYSTERICS!" And I remember at some point having to sit down with him and talk to him because people were getting genuinely upset; people from St. Ann's [School] were saying, "WHO'S THAT LITTLE FUCKER WHO KEEPS SAYING 'FUCK THE HYSTERICS?' THE HYSTERICS ARE OUR GREATEST PRODUCT FROM ST. ANN'S!"

I saw Tetsuwan play a few shows and I said, "I want to start a band!" I had known Jack [Ferencz] for a long time and we met Felix [Walworth] at... Camp years before and [Felix] was the world's shittiest guitar player when we met him. When Jack [Ferencz] met [Felix] at a party [some time later] he said, "I met that kid Felix again," and I said, "I don't know who you're talking about," and Jack said, "He plays the drums now!"

So we went to [Felix's] house and he clearly had no idea what he was doing at the time but because Jack and I had never played with a drummer before we were all said, "THIS IS AMAZING!" And Will [Tesdell] said, "I hear you've started a band, let me hear a song." He came back a week later with a full page of lyrics and said, "I'm in the band!"

JG: Cool & Unusual... We were different people because I was fat and [Ian] wore short khakis all the time - [Ian] still does. And [he] used to have only band t-shirts.

IC: I still do only wear band t-shirts. And at that time I was listening to Marilyn Manson.

JG: Yeah, all the band shirts were: Marilyn Manson.

JG: But the three of us were into Queen, Arcade Fire and Modest Mouse. Those were the only things we listened to.

ES: I have the recordings of them that I stole off Jack's computer and they're just three recordings of Jack, Ian and Henry screaming Bohemian Rhapsody at the top of their lungs. They're all over 6 min long.

JG: We do every single part.

IC: Before Cool & Unusual, my very first band in a practice situation was with Ludwig [Persik] from The Bones Royal and Good Omen and Alex Niemetz from Mod Rocket and Sandra Nazz from Modrocket and this kid Kevin Gannon...

JG: ...with Ian Cory in a room playing Led Zeppelin.

IC: We would just do Led Zeppelin covers and at that point I could do parts of Zeppelin songs but I couldn't play fast enough to play Rock and Roll. That's what made me get my shit together on drums because Ludwig was a really good guitarist and Alex Niemetz was good and Sandra Nazz was not that good of a guitar player.

ES: I said it before but in terms of inspiration for me it was purely the other bands who were around who were my peers; they'd play a song and I'd be, like, "That song is fucking awesome."

JG: I think Fabian is one of our peers - he's our age.

ES: I don't know. He's two years younger than me, a year younger than you. But at the time the bands that were popping up were friends of me and friends of [Jack Greenleaf]. I remember when [The Floor Is Lava] started, Tetsuwan was the greatest band ever and the songs they did we were always, "How did they do that? That's awesome!" That was back when Jonathan [Betz of Whiskey Crusaders and Earth Defense Force] still played drums for them. When we formed they were the coolest thing, and so everything was just [all of us] trying to one-up each other but in a really friendly way. There were very few egos there until later. It was always, "They did something awesome, we need to go back and sit in my basement for three hours and try and figure out something awesome that we can do."

IC: In Cool & Unusual we started doing weird time signatures first. We had a song in 13/8.

JG: And it was our most popular song.

ES: Odyssey?

JG: It was really catchy. You wrote this really strange drum beat and Henry, being simple; back then he didn't know how to play the bass as well so he would have little melodies but they were so catchy.

IC: The point I was going to make by saying I was in The Bones Royal is when I left The Bones Royal I was so angry and I said, "I'm going to form a band! And it's going to be with Jack and Henry and we're going to be great!" That [thought] became Cool & Unusual.

JG: See, [my experience] was totally different. We were all playing Halo and I was like, "Yo, [Ian] you have a drum set," and Henry was like, "Yeah I think I have a bass amp; I'll ask my dad," and I was like, "I have a guitar amp!" We walked over through the snow and played Another One Bites the Dust for three hours.

ES: I think I have a few takes of you doing that too.

IC: For me, my drive was to be better than The Bones Royal.

JG: I thought Fiasco had a lot of advantages because they started in 6th grade and we were [just starting in] 8th grade and we were [thinking], "Oh shit, it’s too late." I was playing guitar and thinking, "Wow, I really don't know how to play guitar." So I think that inspired me to be a better musician.

ES: For a long time my view of Fiasco was like, "Oh, it's Steve Buscemi's kid; he probably gets them all their shows; they're probably terrible." But when the Floor Is Lava record came out I was trying to push it on kids at Berkeley Carroll and [Fiasco] was selling their record and I traded with Julian [Bennett Holmes]. I said, "Do you want to buy this?" and he said, "I'll trade you for God Loves Fiasco." I went home and listened to it and I said, "Oh my GOD this is GREAT! They do know what they're doing! Forget it!"

IC: It's not all Soñar.

ES: It's not all Soñar, which is 20 minutes of feedback.

JG: Julian and Lucian's noise band it was just... the opposite of "light." It was just noise.

ES: Yeah and that was my impression of Fiasco before I heard Fiasco.

JG: It was great because before they got popular Lucian [billed himself] as Lucian Ray, which is his middle name, on everything. There was no connection [between Lucian and Steve, his father] until they got to the Todd P stage and then he put [Buscemi] back. Which I thought was really good and I think it's funny when people say, "Oh, well his DAD made them popular...." It's quite the opposite.

ES: And even if he is [Steve's son], they're still great.

JG: But, y'know, we could suck their dicks more right now.

IC: If Jonathan was here he would probably say that it wasn’t like that at all. The thing is, sitting here with the three of us, I already know what [Jack and Eli’s] opinions of Random Child are. I'd love to hear what Joey and Jonathan have to say about Random Child in an interview.

JG: I think if we take Random Child out into the community, where we're already familiar faces, we'll be accepted.

IC: People will say [sarcastically], "Oh man! It's a super group!"

JG: Yeah, like we thought The Mighty Handful was [going to be].

ES: Back when you were The Vision.

JG: Oh God we used to be The Vision.

RG: That's not as good as The Mighty Handful.

ES: I remember thinking that [The Vision] was the most pretentious thing of all time.

JG: I remember when Jack [Ferencz] told me, or it might have been Henry, because they way they got band names was Wikipedia. They would just click through until something cool came up. We were almost St. Elmo's Fire.

ES: I just remember how Jack Ferencz and Henry Crawford talked about how there was going to be eight people in the band and it was going to be awesome. And I [makes dismissive gesture]. I called Jack [Greenleaf] and asked what it was going to be called and he said, "The Vision!"

JG: I think it's interesting the growth that The Mighty Handful have gone through. It was a competition within the band at first. It was like, we wanted everyone to be in it and then we wanted no one to be in it and we wanted to kick each other out.

IC: And Random Child is the exact opposite.

JG: I don't know. I feel like now that it's just the five of us and Jessie [Goldberg, of Banzai] and Claire [Ardito] are this horn section that’s really professional and cooperative and really nice people. And I think we hold our own without them and with them we're better.

ES: Like when They Might Be Giants have a horn section at their shows they're even cooler.

JG: But I think with the familiar faces Random Child will be a success as a live band. The hard part is going to be getting that sound [live]. The thing about doing the recordings is that those are sounds we could never play live.

ES: That's the thing, doing this record and being in the studio - this is such a studio band for me, because The Floor Is Lava was all about performing and then we recorded because we thought it'd be fun. But with Random Child, when we joined the band, we were all like, "We're never going to have any shows; we might have one, maybe."

IC: We won a talent show though.

ES: We did, with only 3/5ths of the band there.

IC: And I was playing drums and singing.

ES: When I was writing [for the band] I was thinking, "When we record this it will sound really awesome." What's really cool is when we recorded it - we had all these overdubs and harmonies we never thought we could do live - but when we had practice a few weeks ago I taught parts to [Jack] and I taught parts to Joey and it sounded really good and I think we might be able to [play the songs] live.

IC: Also, a shout out to Dan Müller from InDelirium plays on the record. During the really slow part of Angel of Dead new York - he's doing the really ridiculous metal vocals.

JG: I was a great experience and in conclusion - IN CONCLUSION - We'll see [about Random Child] but we've all become more professional through the studio recording [process].

THE RANDOM CHILD ALBUM IS CALLED Treatment, AND IT WILL BE RELEASED IN SPRING/EARLY SUMMER 2009

PLEASE ALSO SEE INTERVIEW I WITH EARTH DEFENSE FORCE FROM JUNE, 2008

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Help Me, Alex. Help Me Help You
Consumer Feedback, Knitting Factory, 10/4/08

I'm going to invent the genre of "Classic Punk" to occupy the same niche as "Classic Rock," as in 'we've come to change the future of Classic Punk forever,' or 'they sound very Classic Punk.' They'll hate me for it, but I want to think Consumer Feedback lives in that space.

Further,

Dear Knitting Factory,

Why come you don't turn no lights on for the afternoon shows? I know the lights exist physically -- I can see them with my naked eye and I've seen them turned on in the past. Are you saving that much money? Are you comfortable with your lack of effort? Is there an image of slapdash fuck-it-all-ness you're trying to maintain? Are they broken? For God's sake don't try to make things look cool -- that would break my heart.

Sincerely,

Richard Gin

P.S. I look forward to you moving to the current Luna Lounge space and somehow managing to make the lighting worse. See you next year!

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Motion To Previous Question
Fiasco, Market Hotel, 8/5/08

It seems that I remembered how to do things correctly and now I want to shoot with film more often. What's that about hubris? Real scans WILL BE DONE, but that WILL take a while. Gimme a week or two.

For those who come in through the front door on the Blog, the rest of them are here and there will be more going up shortly.

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Brute Force Works Sometimes
Clip Test

So my refrigerator died, which is a dumb way to start a post about concert pictures. Anyway, my refrigerator died which means that I had to clean it out so the little men who took it away would not hurt themselves before bringing in the NEW refrigerator. In my cleaning I found fifteen or so rolls of long-since expired Fujipan 400 and I, never being one to leave an expensive stone unrolled (or whatever), decided to shoot Fiasco's goodbye show at Market Hotel.

Long story short, I realized I should probably do a clip test because God-knows how long I've had that film in the fridge and who knows how well it's held up. Plus I have no idea what I'm doing in general (fun fact!).

This is the clip test. Scans of the real deal to come soon. Or not. I have to shoot my brother's wedding so that will take up a lot of time.

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Website Updated
Antimagic, 6/3/08, Glasslands Gallery

The Main Site has been updated! After some code twiddling and image winnowing there is now a "Bands" gallery. I suspect that particular unit will see frequent and intense updating. Above is Antimagic, who are clearly celebrating this development (no endorsement of Richard Gin or richardgin.org is implied).

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INTERVIEW I, Earth Defense Force, 6/24/08
What follows is a conversation with Earth Defense Force, conducted on June 24th, 2008.

RICHARD GIN: We are here with Earth Defense Force, Ian Cory, Calamity Sam, whose Christian name I do not know, and Jon Betz. Would you guys like to introduce yourselves?

IAN CORY: I'm Ian Cory and I play drums.

CALAMITY SAM: I'm Calamity Sam. I play bass and sing.

JON BETZ: I'm Jon I play guitar.

RG: Thank you for coming on guys. So Ian, where are you from; how did you start?

IAN: I'm from Park Slope -- do you mean start with the band or start playing drums?

RG: In broad terms.

IAN: I started playing drums when I was in 8th grade and I'm graduating high school in two days.

RG: Congratulations.

IAN: Thank you. I started playing drums because of Jack Greenleaf and Henry Crawford from The Mighty Handful; the three of us are very good friends. The three of us were going to start a band and we did. We're no longer together.

RG: That was Cool and Unusual?

IAN: Yeah, and that was the main reason I started playing drums and I've always been into music. Back when I played video games a lot I would play levels over again to hear the music because I'm that much of a nerd.

SAM: What levels?

JON: Final Fantasy VII, right? That had the best music.

IAN: Yeah! Final Fantasy VII had the greatest music.

SAM: I like Zelda more.

JON: In terms of game play or music?

(Laughter)

IAN: I was more of a Playstation person. I never really had that Nintendo experience until recently.

RG: Sam, your turn.

SAM: I live down the street in Brooklyn Heights and I knew Jonathan through Alex Lowchy and we formed Tetsuwan Fireball [which existed] up until last year. Pretty much the way [Earth Defense Force] started was our old drummer, Alex Doyle, had to go to college so we got Ian to fill in on drums with Tetsuwan Fireball and for a second Jack [Greenleaf] and Hank Crawford were also in the band.

RG: That was the Cake Shop show, right?

SAM: Yeah and that didn't work out very well, so it was pretty much an aborted experiment and so we had a series of really horrible rehearsals that ended with me and Jonathan coming out [to Brooklyn] and just wanting to kill ourselves. After one of them I went to Jonathan and said, "That was the worst rehearsal! I can't do that again," and Jon was like, "YEAH!" and he pulled out a handle of Jack [Daniel's] and I was like, "If we stay in this band we're going to become alcoholics." So we're like, 'let's kick everyone out,' except for Ian and we did. And that's how Earth Defense Force came about.

RG: OK, Jon?

JON: I'm from around Brooklyn and I play guitar in Earth Defense Force. [We didn't know what to expect from] the first rehearsal and so I was like, "I'm going to take this song from a really long time ago." It was probably the most nutsy song you'll ever hear -- and then we just realized we just have to make music that doesn't make any sense.

IAN: That was "Number 41."

JON: Right. It's about Tetsuo Shima from Akira

RG: Sam, I know the old Tetsuwan Fireball best and that was a really "poppy" band, and those sensibilities show through with the two tracks from your single, "Kindergarten Gymnastics" and "Time & Time Again," but those two songs are definitely harder in terms of production and content.

SAM: Yeah, it's all about balancing the two out -- sometimes in rehearsal we'll just layer on parts and parts and parts and it just wont make sense after a while and I'm like, "Hey, shouldn't we have a verse and a chorus part?" and a lot of times these two will be like "NO! NO! We can't do that! It's selling out!" Not those words exactly -- but then it sort of falls into that because it's a matter of habit. You can't expect the listener to swallow everything. So you do it in short spurts.

IAN: And sometimes you just have to force it down their throats.

RG: Do you all come to rehearsal with a set of ideas or lyrics or melodies and bang around? Talk a bit about the process.

SAM: Yeah.

IAN: Somewhat.

JON: I think out writing process is really rhythmically heavy. With a lot of the songs Ian will have this rhythm figure in his head and then we'll simply throw guitar over it; add parts to it, but it's really rhythmically heavy because we're getting more into odd time signatures.

(The interview is interrupted by a laborer, who is working on construction next door. In the original audio file the sound is quite intense and bothersome.)

JON: The noise is because we're actually building our fortress next door.

SAM: For the sake of defense.

RG: So Earth needs defending then?

ALL: Yeah!

IAN: Very badly.

RG: What super powers do you bring to that battle?

SAM: We don't have any super powers, but our villains are several. They include "Uncle 5."

JON: He's a zombie pedophile uncle.

IAN: That's a new song in the works.

JON: There's a surgeon who cuts up his patients.

RG: From "Time & Time Again"?

ALL: Right.

SAM: There's the "Dada Destroyer" who...

JON: ...Eats children.

SAM: He's disguised as a teenager and runs amok destroying peoples' lives.

IAN: Through Dada.

RG: Was Earth Defense Force actually the first concept you came up with following the deaths of Cool & Unusual and Tetsuwan Fireball?

SAM: No. I was ready to keep doing Tetsuwan Fireball stuff and the stuff I write naturally is kind of, like, pussy and more like The Replacements and in the vein of, "Oh! I need to express my soul!" But then we just wrote the song "Number 41" and it became apparent that [Tetsuwan Fireball-style songs] would not do at all.

JON: With only three people in the band you don't have much room for guitarmonies and/or harmonies.

IAN: We make do with what we have though.

JON: We're not the prettiest motherfuckers in New York so we make up for it with anger and chaos.

SAM: Or like, we're the fat ugly girl at the prom who you end up sleeping with when you get too fucked up and at first it's not cool and you're like, 'my friends won’t like me,' but then it feels really good!

JON: And you can say, 'I had sex with the fat girl.' That's something I will say, I played in a nutty trio of people whose sole purpose is singing about pedophile uncles.

RG: You mentioned The Replacements as an influence on previous work. How did you find them?

IAN: I don't listen to them -- just Sam.

SAM: I found The Replacements in 8th grade through a friend of mine and I'd always tell people, "Yo, The Replacements!" and they're like, "The what?" And only recently there was this girl, Grace, and she kind of turned everyone on to The Replacements, but I was already there.

RG: Talk a bit about influences in that vein.

IAN: Well I bring most of the heavy stuff to the table. I'm a huge metalhead; that's mainly what I listen to -- although I'm fine with just about anything. When we started doing "Number 41" I was like, "Whoa this sounds like Botch!" and I started bringing these guys all the records of, like, Death, Dillinger Escape Plan, Botch, Converge, stuff like that. So those are mainly my influences: The tech-y, odd time signature, fast, aggressive stuff. It's not stupid heavy -- straight up death metal chugging stuff. There's a bit more art to it.

SAM: And Math.

IAN: Yeah.

SAM: I don't really listen to anything on my own that sounds like Earth Defense Force. I listen to Pavement and Television religiously. But Pterodactyl and Marnie Stern are two Brooklyn bands that I really got into this year and are the only things I can think of that sound vaguely like us.

IAN: Those are definitely influences.

SAM: Pterodactyl's guitarist was my physics teacher -- he feverently denied being in Pterodactyl for, like, two years and eventually [the truth] came out and I saw one of his shows. He's such a quiet person he's like, "Oh yes, physics. Today I'm gonna teach you about magnetism." Then I saw him on stage and he was, like, flipping out and going crazy and there's noise through the entire thing and I was like, "This is what we have to be like."

RG: What is your in relationship to the scene and other bands?

(Laughter)

RG: This is a serious question!

JON: None whatsoever! To put it bluntly...

SAM: We're probably the most anti-social band.

IAN: Well I still hang out with guys from other bands. Since I used to be in another band with the guys from The Mighty Handful and I'm friends with them I’d say I have the most contact out of the three of us. I like those guys. They're great people. I'm not a huge fan of their music because they're not really my thing. They know that about me. It's like, whatever, they do what they do well and I still go and support them when I get the chance. I used to be more connected to the other bands but lately I'm more focused on my own material and working on my own music and... getting... good.... I spent enough time socializing and being like, "Yay! Let's go party with the other bands!" It's not for me.

RG: The question wasn't directed so much towards The Mighty Handful as much as the scene in general and how dense it is.

All: (Various mutterings and laughing about "The Scene.")

IAN: We've got this joke rivalry with The Mighty Handful.

SAM: I thought with Tetsuwan Fireball we were really ingrained with "The Scene" and then we had kind of a falling out... well, I did... with most of those kids. So... I'm sorry. For the past few months I don't know it's like we've been asleep and all this stuff is happening without us. And now it's like, we're going to college...

JON: ...I should be in college.

SAM: So it's like, everything has this weird timetable and it feels like it's all ending so it doesn't really matter.

RG: The feeling that it's ending -- Does that weigh on the choices you make?

SAM: I think it gives us more freedom.

IAN: Yeah, a bit more.

JON: We can be as much of an asshole on stage as we want. We won't be seeing half the people I guess. Not that we want to be assholes, but that we aspire to be.

SAM: It was like, when I was in 9th grade my plan was to start a band and we'd play a bunch of shows and get a lot of hype and then when I was a senior I'd get signed so I didn't have to go to college. Obviously it didn't work out that way.

RG: It's a sound plan!

SAM: But now it's not happening that way and now it's like...

JON: Reputation is on the bottom of our priorities. Put it that way.

IAN: We do what we want.

JON: We do what we want and it doesn't affect the writing process at all.

SAM: I think it does. If I had another 4 years in Brooklyn I'd probably be in another band in addition to [Earth Defense Force] but this [band] is, like, [for] kicks...

RG: So then college plans take you far away from each other?

SAM: Yeah but we'll stay in touch. We'll do Postal Service stuff. We'll send 8 tracks and shit back and forth to each other.

IAN: I imagine we'll come back together during breaks and try to learn the material again. That's why we need to record.

RG: Talk about recording and access and technology and ultimately release and distribution. How did you put together your single?

SAM: In May I was interning at Newkirk Studios, which is where we recorded Tetsuwan Fireball's first album. It's a small studio and it's run by this guy Ben Rice who's in a band called Surefire . They're kind of a Led Zeppelin/70's rock thing. But he's like the chillest guy in the world he looks like a 20-something roadie for The Rolling Stones. So I interned there and he just gave us a really good deal. His thing is just that he'll record anything and he was very open to trying our kind of stuff, which he hadn't done before. One of his lessons to me as his protegee was, "Listen Sam, people are going to come up to you and ask you to record them and you're not going to know how the fuck to record a death metal band but, goddammit, you just got to give it the ol' college try and put yourself out there!"

IAN: and the recording process was really great. I mean, we got there, set up the drums, I had a lot of fun messing up on "Time & Time Again." It took me like, six tries to get that down...

SAM: He's being modest. He's a total pro.

JON: He played with the click [track], goddammit!

(Laughter)

JON: The only teenager in park slope to play with the fucking click!

IAN: We just jammed out the bass stuff and the guitars -- there are two guitars.

JON: Yeah I pretty much played the same parts with two guitars. And then I slightly changed one of the guitar tracks by playing something a little different... but not enough that you would notice up front so that it sounds like a mistake. But I thought that was kind of cool. I was listening to a lot of Blood Brothers when I was [recording] and they do the same thing -- kind of doubling, really. But then there'll be some moments where it's like, "oh that was really cool!"

SAM: Now he's being modest too. Jon's recording style -- I remember from Tetsuwan Fireball -- is that he would stay up the day before and think of fifty-million different parts to overdub and he'd be like, "I have one or two things," and we'd think, "Cool this'll be quick," and he'd be like, "Uh... no. 15 more guitar tracks."

IAN: It wasn't that bad this time.

JON: No, it wasn't.

IAN: He kept himself contained to some degree. The biggest thing we have in terms of guitar tracks is in "Kindergarten" where is breaks down into the slower post rock part of that lead with big reverb and that guitar part is, like 3 guitar parts.

SAM: And then the lyrics I just made up in he booth.

(Laughter)

RG: Your live show is quite similar to your recorded output.

JON: It was very different with Tetsuwan Fireball because our live shows were a lot heaver and also a lot more sloppy and our album was really...

IAN: ...Pretty...

JON: ...Clean cut, which is good, but if you can't really live up to the album your recording it's kind of a joke. Especially with a band like Earth Defense Force and the energy we have -- you got to keep it simple and put your balls to the wall and rock out.

RG: How do you go about finding shows? Finding all-ages venues seems to be kind of a trick.

SAM: I mean, yeah I'm kind of the one who does booking on this. I mean there are places. There's the Knitting Factory, Cake Shop.

IAN: Don Hills.

SAM: Yeah, Don Hills. We've kind of built a rapport with all these people because they know we can bring enough kids.

JON: This kid Kabir Kumar got us this gig on Saturday so props to him.

SAM: It's tough, but you just send emails like any other band.

IAN: Yeah, there's Southpaw and we were going to play Southpaw last weekend but things just really didn't work out. We were going to play it; we should probably try booking it for July actually.

SAM: The best places are the ones that don't treat you like kids. Whereas Southpaw has, like, all-ages matinees so you kind of feel like you're being used.

IAN: And you don't get paid.

SAM: You don't get paid which is a real drag.

JON: Well you get pizza. I enjoyed the pizza.

RG: You don't get a door cut at Southpaw?

IAN: That's the thing that Steve is kind of known for.

SAM: But pretty much the second you're in a band you realize you're never going to make money and every scent you get you're going to lose instantly.

IAN: Like, the money we got from the Knitting Factory show we spent two days later on recording.

SAM: Being in a kid band sucks -- the whole thing in general about promotion and shit. But you gotta pay your dues.

RG: You say, "Being in a kid band..." and I don't want to call you guys a kid band...

IAN: I've always found the term insulting.

RG: As someone who has a fine grasp on ethnic slurs and dirty jokes and what is and isn't offensive I can say I don't want to call anyone a "kid band."

SAM: You can call us "cunts" too.

RG: It's a good mic check. Is there anything besides "kid band" that you think you'd rather be called? Or are you just a "band" at this point?

SAM: Ian doesn't like it but I personally like it. I think it's good because kids play rock 'n' roll better than adults. Period. Just because you get jaded really quickly. I mean, Jonathan and I had this discussion a few days ago I asked him, "Are you gonna go to college for music?" and he said, "No," and I was like, "Why? All you do is practice all you do is music shit," and he's all, "Musicians are, like, the most unhappy people in the world."

JON: I actually play in a few other bands who are like, "professional musicians" and I'm kind of hip to, like, playing clubs at midnight and they're NOT that great. It's glorified -- I mean you, pretty much have to pay for your car back because I play upright bass; if you have equipment; you gotta pay for a 5 dollar beer. And there's no after party! Because everyone wants to pack up their stuff and all these guys got to go teach the next day. It's not that great.

SAM: Nope. Kids are better. They play like they're going to die the next day.

JON: And then they party like they're going to die the next day.

IAN: Sometimes they play like they don't give a shit. That's my experience. I mean, in Cool & Unusual -- ask any of us -- we could not get our shit together. It was like, "I don't even care anymore." And we got sick of that really fast. I understand where they're coming from. I just don't like being referred to as a kid band. Nowadays I don't like being referred to as a "kid band" because now I'm about to graduate high school.

21:57 RG: Right, at this point you can say you ain't kids.

JON: Look at this moustache, man!

JON: I don't look at us like a "kid band," I look at us as people... trying to save the Earth. I mean come on. You can't be a kid. You gotta have your stuff together. You gotta be organized. You gotta come to rehearsal on time and I mean that's the most important part... so I don't know, man.

RG: Where can we get the single?

IAN: You can get it for free.

SAM: Yeah you can get it for free on Myspace, http://myspace.com/defendthisplanet, and if you come to our show on Saturday -- North Bergen -- we're going to hand it out for free. And we're playing with The Mighty Handful, Radiates and Tinselfish.

IAN: There's some other band too.

SAM: I think it's "Every Bunny's Invited."

JON: Right, some stupid fucking name.

IAN: If they turn out to be cool people, we're sorry.

SAM: I mean, if they have "bunny" in their name then maybe they like Echo and the Bunnymen so that'd be cool.

JON: Or maybe they just like pink bunnies and shit.

SAM: Band names. Band names are tough. You can tell someone's first band by their band name. "Every Bunny's Welcome" -- definitely their first band. Tetsuwan Fireball was our first band name and that is a shit name.

JON: I wanted to change it so many times.

IAN: Nothing is as bad as Cool & Unusual Punishment. That is the worst band name ever.

RG: It's... young.

IAN: Yeah, see? That's a kid band. Cool & Unusual was a kid band. I'll admit to that. We treated ourselves like kids, y'know... and it worked out.

SAM: Like, everybody's done with their first string of bands. And I felt like that was the elementary school phase. Where you just learn the dynamics and stuff.

IAN: Now we're all in middle school and hate each other.

SAM: Yeah we hate each other. But we have a better idea of how a band works.

RG: The one thing I remember about High School graduation was the urge to escape. Is that feeling inside you guys even though you live in New York?

IAN: Yeah.

JON: Well I'm going to college in NY.

IAN: I am very, very hyped on getting out of here, personally. I'm going to Chicago for college. It's still a city environment. I want a break, from these people and the scene – I mean, these guys are cool.

SAM: I kid of feel the same way; I'm kind of sick of everyone just doing the same shit all the time. On the other hand I feel like this is just when things are going to break and I feel like something good's on the horizon for everyone in Brooklyn right now. And I just went to a show at Death By Audio and I hadn't been there before and I was like, "Shit! why haven't we been playing these places? What the fuck have we been doing the last 6 months?"

JON: Rehearsing.

RG: Is there anything you want to take back?

JON: Like, what we said or...?

RG: Basically.

IAN: We regret nothing.

SAM: I regret everything.

RG: What are your upcoming dates?

IAN: Saturday June 28th in North Bergen, NJ and Saturday, July 26th at the Knitting Factory Old Office. Hopefully this time if we do well we'll get moved up to the second stage.

SAM: They never let us... we played the main stage and we brought 100 people and they still didn't let us move up.

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A Song of Dispair
Michael Jordan, 6/21/08, Goodbye Blue Monday

They came full bore like Mongols from the east following the scent of blood and there was panic in the room as they counted and played. "This will be bad; such sorrow, such sorrow," someone said aloud, though that someone was probably me. That which I had not read in histories I had seen before -- the broken dreams and shattered skulls and bloodied limbs strewn about pell mell like tinsel on a Christmas tree. And the distended faces of the wailing and the rending of garments! Women lamented and huddled by the cold steel walls, and the dust rose as the invaders beat and stomped in time and chanted themes of intimidation and slaughter.

Michael Jordan, 6/21/08, Goodbye Blue Monday

Michael Jordan -- a name fit to boil blood and steam the innards of the weak and infirm. The tales of woe handed down from block to bock rang true in our primitive minds and animal urges took control: TO DANCE, to scream and shout and experience the suffering and horror of generations past; the denial of self -- the hivemind. Would we be bold enough to beat back the savage display of carnal, base ritual or would be assimilated into their ranks, any past remnants of our culture swallowed like the children of Saturn.

Michael Jordan, 6/21/08, Goodbye Blue Monday

The promise of our survival was short lived. Some fell to the floor and struggled to stand only to fall again, weak as a fresh foal before the butcher and timid as a three-legged sheep before wolves. Those that fled -- God save them -- were left to sow their crops amongst the pitious cowards and fancy-boys who lay like fallen busts in orderly rows in the garden with their clove cigarettes.

Michael Jordan, 6/21/08, Goodbye Blue Monday

When it was over we were converted -- we were helpless to protect ourselves from their will and succumbed to the raging sea. In the silence that followed there was peace and the sun shined behind us and a songbird twitterchirped in the rustling trees. They had gone. We looked on each other with shame and disgust -- we looked at ourselves and felt soiled -- unclean.

Michael Jordan raped us.

Michael Jordan, 6/21/08, Goodbye Blue Monday

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We Go On After Some Lip-Synch Chicks.
So I think I might put a moratorium on covering Battles of the Bands, not just because we need to think of peace in these troubled times, but because they are no less weird than they were when I was a misguided youth. Disparate acts, three song limits, a harried and hurried pace that serves no one (least of all the showcase bands) and varying qualities of M'sC succeed in keeping everyone off balance and looking for the exits once their friends' sets are done.

The Mighty Handful, Knitting Factory, 5/25/08

Frankly, this particular BoB was doubly confounding, mostly due to the latter awards giving-portion of the show where the majority of gifts and trinkets (Golden records?! Pieces of paper!?) seemed to be given to the A&R, MGMT side of the production rather than to the bands themselves. This brings me back to my original confusion with the Blast:Beat program and where the money goes, where the money lies once it gets there, and who OWNS the bands' music and who ultimately runs the promotion -- something that their website never cleared up. If I remember properly, my fwiends over at Only The Blog Knows Brooklyn described it as seeming like a '4-H Club for kids in bands,' a criticism which seems valid sonically -- meant literally, "as I say it in my head it makes me laugh" -- as well as in practice.

The Mighty Handful, Knitting Factory, 5/25/08

Stream of thought bulletin: While poking around the internet we arrive at Blastspace.com, the ground-level Facebookian arm of the BlastBeat.org website. PLEASE LOOK AT THE UPPER RIGHT BUTTON WHICH FEATURES "COCA-COLA BLASTBEAT." I ain't sayin' there's something sinister going on, but this...

Photobucket

...should be enough to remind anyone of the awful Coca-Cola budding filmmaker commercials they show at the movie theaters during "The 20" or whatever the fuck it's called. It should remind the oldsters of Up With People being sponsored by Gilette. It should definitely make any self-respecting punk give pause.

The Mighty Handful, Knitting Factory, 5/25/08

It occurred to me, and I said as much to Hugh Crawford, that the history of Rock Music is written by the bands whose gumption and spit determined their destiny rather than the whims or skull scratching decisions made by talent fair judges. In fact, the only two acts I could think of at the time were Stevie Wonder and James Brown, and a suspicious search of Wikipedia (sue me) quickly showed those examples to be wrong. Now, the only one I can think of is Kelly Clarkson (sue me).

Creepy Corporate Overlording aside, all of this is the ball-hording way of saying "so what?" Yes, a trip to Ireland would be a major, life altering experience for a group of teens who might not have had the privilege of traveling outside the United States, and seeing the competition might inspire even greater things from those involved but the failure to make the trip in this particular instance isn't in the ballpark of worst things to happen. The Sub-20's music scene in New York (you can call it "Kidcore" if you want, but that's bogus and sad) is too dense and rich -- and too competitive and talented -- to hold anything less than the best the age bracket/genre can provide and by extension... you know what Sinatra said. Further, the support group of enthusiastic Post-Teen bands whose song structure and public attitude implies reckless juvenilization is there to lead the way and provide access, instruction and perhaps most importantly, a valuable crossover audience:

An audience with money.

This is meant as consolation to all the bands that lost, whatever form they took. My favorites included.

The Mighty Handful, Knitting Factory, 5/25/08

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On The Road Again
I will be in New Orleans for this event and I'm a little bummed that I will likely be locked in to covering The Mighty Hannibal ONLY and not be able to get to ? And The Mysterians or Roky Erickson. Not that I don't want to cover Hannibal -- it's just that the bill itself is INSANE and it would be a shame to miss most of it for work-related reasons.

Oh yeah. I'll be in New Orleans this week. Please let me know what's up besides the Jazz Festival. I also have, shall we say, the ability to post images remotely, so I will try to do some semi-live blogging for the first time. I've also also had custom earplugs molded. I intend to do a macro of them at some point soon.

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Snatching Defeat From The Jaws Of Victory
Breaking News: Rocky doesn't beat Apollo Creed, Truman defeats Dewey, and The Mighty Handful finish third (out of six) in the Battle of the Bands at Bard. They received a gift certificate to the Virgin Megastore with a value of twenty-five (25) United States Dollars. The sound system failed (after numerous microphone dropkicks), the drums fell apart, and Greenleaf bloodied himself. The principal, however, was apparently furious about the confetti. In the end, all is right and well in the universe.
















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Something To Du
The Mighty Handful, Don Hill's, 3/1/08

I have had a difficult time explaining why I like the Mighty Handful so much. Most of my thoughts are scattershot and age-ist of the "talented enough to be good; not good enough to care" variety and don't do them justice. The pleasure might be in the thrill of discovery -- those precious few months you have where the secret is yours to share with everyone and anyone who will listen.

The Mighty Handful, Don Hill's, 3/1/08

Most of the seminal bands I've enjoyed in my life were discovered a few years (or more) past their sell date; The Who, The Replacements, all of the NY post-punk bands. There are notable exceptions (including Pavement, Sleater-Kinney, Neko Case, and all the new [bands] out there that sound like them), but my music has historically been acquired a day late and at a bargain price in the resale bin. Some of this was due to (my) date of birth, some due to the inevitable decline that bands go through once they stop having hard-ons for anything that moves and embrace the rapidly advancing twilight of middle age.

The Mighty Handful, Don Hill's, 3/1/08

The Mighty Handful are nowhere near that place, so they seem fresh and new even as they chatter amongst themselves and realize that Oh Domestic Me! sounds suspiciously like Tangled Up In Blue. Developmentally, they are at the time and place where small steps are giant strides; They are tighter than when I saw them two months ago, and though Aviva keeps slinking off to the side to avoid the carnage (live, they are 5/6ths Keith Moon) they have developed the good common sense to not tack her solo song at the end of the show; the previous result led to a, "...and this is my adopted daughter Margot," sense of unease as the rest of the boys packed themselves away.

The Mighty Handful, Don Hill's, 3/1/08

They're playing Southpaw on the 15th and I intend to go out of loyalty and curiosity and to take my "adult" drunken friends who look at me like I'm chicken little every time I start muttering about how absurdly great "Uptown Drunks" is. First one on the train gets the best seat.

The Mighty Handful, Don Hill's, 3/1/08

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Stage Diving 101
Stage Diving Etiquette 101

Intro:
So you've decided to join our feathered friends (and bats and squirrels) in the sky through the act of flight! Congratulations! The choice to sacrifice your body and equipment through the impulsive and destructive act of stage diving can be a rewarding and entertaining experience. I've cobbled together this primer to help you through the process. Band-mates should have no fear! I've taken the time to include portions and positioning for them as well. Please note the handy guide numbers in the upper left corner of the images.



1) Ascend.
While common stage dives (off a stage or the more simple "crowd surf") can be enjoyable, a true epic stage dive should be executed from the highest point available. In this instance, our hero has chosen a conspicuously well-placed rolling staircase to the left of the stage. Ascend as high as comfortable, but note that the higher the platform, the more awesome you will appear. Bonus points for continuing to play while preparing to plummet.

2) Pose.
Make sure the crowd sees you! We all know the rhetorical question regarding the tree in the woods. Here, the bassist has taken the "notes become bullets" a.k.a. the "...because of the wang" pose. Several paying customers are already laughing with joy as he readies his body for immortality. Band Note: At this point, you should still be playing at top gear, oblivious as to the throngs of women and young girls no longer eye-fucking you.

3) "The Four Winds."
With mind cleared from distraction and body poised for certain doom, one must cast one's mortal being into the abyss with righteous fervor and a complete disregard for the young girls in the front row. What's more, your band friends have noticed you for the first time in months! The drummer expresses joy and jealousy as he is locked behind his cruel metal cage. A proper guitarist will show no interest in the goings on around him or her, but will instead seethe inwardly as the ill trim in the front row has suddenly developed a taste for "bottom end," if you know what I mean.

4) Landing.
Never assume that someone will catch you. Extending your arm to brake your fall will usually lead to a broken wrist and will lead to an end to excellence, so be prepared to tuck and roll. Use the crowd to increase your coefficient of friction and slow your now-bruised body -- like a bowling ball into hapless pins. It is at this point that the drummer has cocked his arm in an "Atlanta Tomahawk" position to deliver a frustrated drumstick to the head of the bassist. This is custom and one should always be prepared to deflect a stick headed for an eye or an orifice.

5) Momentum and the "Last Resort."
If you are out of audience members to collapse into, the guitarist or lead singer is usually the last safety and one should use any and all gymnastic means to use him or her as a brake. Our bassist has cleverly used the neck of his instrument to hook into the kneecaps of the guitarist as a Navy jet hooks into the cable on the deck of an aircraft carrier. Note that he has tucked his chin down to shield his eyes from the drumstick, which has found its target -- a bruised forehead is better than a bleeding eye.

6) Injury, Recovery and Hospice.
Pain! Pain is fleeting, and death is for the weak. You are alive and you will recover thanks to modern 21st Century medicine and the finest health care system that your parents can provide! Take a breath to fill your lungs with life-affirming oxygen and to clear your mind of suffering -- those are not twins you are seeing, mouthing incomprehensible words as you lie prone on your bruised coccyx, but rather the pretty freegan from two towns over who has a 40 year old canadian boyfriend. You're seeing double, friend! Band mates: Now is the time to elevate your concern.

7) "The Checkdown."
Like a boxer that has just been knocked down, it is best to walk through a checklist in your head while on the ground -- if you're on the floor, there's nowhere lower to go, so you avoid further injury due to collapse. It is recommended to take stock of one's limbs from the bottom up: feet, legs, hips, chest and head. It is now appropriate for other band members to abandon their positions and rush to your aide. At this point, the show is effectively over and no more music will be played. All that is left is for the stage diver to milk his feat for all it's worth.

8) Results.
The last step involves regailing the hero for his feat of daring. Audience members should applaud and those of the opposite gender should become sexually aroused. Band mates should stand about and deliver the line, "are you ok?" in as dispassionate a manner a possible. A traditional response should be something along the lines of, "I need a [drink/drug/whore]," but feel free to improvise! After all, YOU sacrificed your body like a virgin to Pelé, YOU have the right to demand offerings of your choice.

(Stupid Party at Java Studios, 2/22/08)

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They Covered Can't Hardly Wait. The Suicide Lyrics Version.
The Mighty Handful, 1/26/08

So yeah, The Mighty Handful. Great name. They are actually a sextet, and I like to think it's all part of the joke. I know them through Dan and more specifically Dan's kid, who's the drummer. My deep thoughts about this event are still gestating. in the meantime, I will offer you the rich, reduced broth of the experience.

"We're gonna play a song... ...the last time we played it someone's -- and I won't say whose -- someone's parents got upset."

(From the back of the house) "Were they yours?"

"No, they weren't mine. This song is called 'Uptown Drunks'."

(cheers)


The song is on their Facebook and Myspace pages. It has a medium tempo and a singable chorus. It's about teenagers "experimenting with each other," if you know what I mean. Just sing about sex. Of course. Cut to the chase. If you're going to make parents upset go right for the jugular. If you're trying to woo Sally from homeroom go straight for her skirt.

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I'm Blogging Blind For No Good Reason.
Savonarola

I'm always staying active in spite of the spate of cool weather. Savonarola is playing at Pete's Candy Store on the 24th! So is 99999999999999999... etc! That's Anthony MacBain and some other people, I think! His touring band perhaps!? I will be there! Will you?

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R.I.P Tonic?
It seems that Tonic is closing and because I'm feeling tired and belligerent I'll write this as an epitaph:

The first time I went to Tonic, I shot some dudes' klezmer band.

A few years later I shot These Are Powers:

These Are Powers

Somewhere in between I forgot where Tonic was.

The dudes' whose klezmer band I shot still owe me money.

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ARCHIVES

Bands: If you would like to use photos for Myspace or Facebook purposes, please contact me first. I don't steal your songs; please don't steal my photographs.